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| Barbara Feser, my sister of the heart |
Good evening, my name is Joanne Collins, and I am Barbara’s
friend of 30 years. A long time ago she called me her sister – her sister “of
the heart” along with her other cherished friend and sister, Lynn McFadden.
You see, Barb was raised an only child – and she wanted sisters in her life –
and we were lucky she chose us!
Well, one fine day in 1990 my phone rang. It was Barbara- from New Directions, a wonderful
singles group for mostly “Middle Aged” divorced Catholics sponsored by St
Paul’s Church in nearby Nassau Bay. Barb
knew I had just joined and she invited me to a get-together at her home.
I was raw from my divorce and I gratefully accepted her
invite. That’s how our friendship began
– with kind-hearted, sweet Barb reaching out to me. Suddenly, it was okay not to pretend
to be strong. I could talk about my
feelings with her, cry and she would listen with compassion, understanding and
love. I had a best friend, a “sister,”
and together, we’d figure out this strange new single life.
What was of importance to Barbara?
First and foremost, like most mothers, her two children,
Jerry and Susan and her treasured granddaughter, KATIE. She was so proud
of the responsible adults they became. She loved her husband John’s family, too. She had a particularly close relationship with Amy and was
joyful grandma to her two children, Lindsey and Devin.
Her dogs were so special to her - and gave her continuous
smiles and were a comfort to her after husband, John passed. There was Einstein
(the smart one), Bitsie & Benji and recently Molly and Moxie.
Barb was very grateful for the care that her daughter gave
her during these last 3 years of her illness.
Susie put her life “on hold” to care for her Mom, thus enabling Barb to
stay in the comfort of her home. What a
gift Susie gave her Mom!
Barb and I often talked about her career teaching math
in high school. She absolutely loved GEOMETRY. Teaching wasn’t always easy, especially
dealing with the paperwork requirements.
But, through it all, she cared deeply about her students and treasured
her teacher friends.
And then, there was Holiday Time
No one loved Christmas as much as BARB. Did any of you see her bookcase of lighted
villages? Wow – and there was the 9 ft
Christmas Tree in her first League City home.
One time, I arrived early to help with a party and noticed
that one of the Christmas candles in the hallway had suddenly fallen over and
set fire to a table covering. We quickly
extinguished the fire with a towel and we shook as we finished getting the
flames and smoke out – just before a crowd arrived!
Barb introduced me to POLISH Christmas Eve. The table was set with 13 different dishes
(for 12 apostles and Christ). The
youngest child went outside to see the first Christmas star in the sky. We even had communion from wafers that she
obtained from her childhood church in Pennsylvania.
Easter, too, was a big event! Many of you will remember her famous Adult
Easter Egg hunts where we stuffed plastic eggs and hid them in the her back
yard. We definitely got into “our inner
child” and everyone had a ball!
And, there were her special cars - she named them – and I think her Ford
convertible, PRECIOUS, was her favorite one of all!
And then there was her love of John
We both wanted to remarry and have a family life. So, we went to dances and single events trying
to meet Mr. Right. I remember the
evening when she first met John. She was so excited! We went through the ups and downs of her
relationship with him, and with my relationships, too. I’ll never forget John and Barb dancing – It
was a joy to behold as they swung around the dance floor.
And then BARB losing her beloved John
One Christmas John was coughing and received a terrible
diagnosis – lung cancer. Barb supported
him during all his treatments and never left his side. I wondered how she would bear his death. She told me that it was OK because she knew he
loved her.
Later, she had the resources to sell her home in League City
and move on to an “Over 55” community where she made many friends and
especially enjoyed playing bridge. Her
dogs, she called them her babies, kept her company.
Lastly, BARB fighting medical challenges
I’ll never forget when she told me she had a brain
tumor! The news came during one of the
happiest times of her life, during her engagement to John. Everyone in our couples’ support group, New
Life, rallied around her. The night
before surgery we held hands and sang, Be Not Afraid, a beautiful song
to give her strength. We rejoiced that
the tumor was benign! This health set-
back didn’t stop her wedding plans! She
obtained a fashionable wig and she looked radiant as she walked down the aisle
at Rice University Chapel in her full-length white wedding dress. What a beautiful time we all had!
During the past few years, she has fought her cancer
diagnosis bravely taking multiple treatments at MD Anderson.
Today, we lost a great
woman. But our Faith tells us she lives on.
She is lifted up ON EAGLES WINGS.
We thank God for Barb, her loving spirit and all that she accomplished
and taught us. We know she is happy in
heaven and wants you to be happy, here on Earth, until you reunite when your
time comes. We will forever be blessed
to have known her.
We will miss you, Mother, Grandmother, Sister, Teacher, Friend, our dear
Barbara!
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